Motivational Mondays – The Marriage Dance

When we were planning for wedding day, one thing that crossed my mind was to have a wedding dance on our Big Day. I’ve always dreamt of bring taken by the hand as a new bride where my groom leads me on the dance floor as we waltzed, in sync with one another footsteps, as we move graciously with our our eyes locked to each other across the room.

But we scrapped the idea as both of us have two left feet and having all the attention when you’re amateurs didn’t sound like such a good idea. But isn’t marriage between two like a dance sometimes?

When Marriage is like a Dance

In the early years of marriage, you uncover new things about each other, so trips and falls are bound to happen and it’s so easy to forgive because you know that your love can conquer all. When you bump into each other, you can laugh it off and know that you”ll always have your partner’s hand to lift you up. It’s also a time of discovery where you learn new things about your spouse, their livings habits, their idiocracies, their personalities, their quirks.

Slowly, you learn that when dancing, someone has to lead and the other will follow. If both parties want to lead at the same time,  the dance will be awkward without much progression and may even  lead to frustrations. 

And here’s the hard part because when one leads, guess what the other needs to so? Yes, follow the lead. And in a practical sense, that means to be humble to try your partner’s suggestion, to be open to possibilities and learn to go with the flow. Personally, that’s a hard one for me as I can be very stubborn and want things done my way. But when two dance partners cannot flow together, it will be harder to move in unison and move in the same direction.

Another thing that two need when dancing is chemistry. Sure, there’s always lots of it at the beginning when sparks fly.  But as the years go by, and familiarity sets in,  you snap when your partner steps on your feet and you’ll give him the look when he suggests to dance another way.

Chemistry takes time to develop and it’s something that’s gets deeper with time, just like with practice. No one enters a marriage bring an expert at it.  It takes time and effort to have a thriving marriage. The more time you invest time and love in it, the better you both become.

Remember that in marriage, you’re not just partners for one dance, but for a lifetime. Enjoy the dance.



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Comments: 8

  1. Jus July 7, 2014 at 2:23 pm Reply

    Thanks for the beautiful illustration! It’s true that marriage is a dance: I must keep reminding myself that it takes one to lead and other to follow, cos I also tend to be stubborn and want my own way! Thank you for the reminder!

    • Susan July 7, 2014 at 6:59 pm Reply

      🙂 Heh that’s something that I need to learn myself too Justina. Let’s learn to enjoy the dance of our lives.

  2. Ai Sakura July 7, 2014 at 4:34 pm Reply

    Oh yes I can be so headstrong and stubborn as well and it’s hard letting go of the reins sometimes but if there one person I trust enough to let it go to, it’s definitely hubby. Big hugs and hope you’re feeling better now

    Ai @ Sakura Haruka

    • Susan July 7, 2014 at 6:59 pm Reply

      Thanks for your virtual hug Ai. I’m feeling better today 🙂

  3. Adeline July 7, 2014 at 10:22 pm Reply

    What an apt analogy! For us, I think we take turns to lead, depending on the situation, and based on our strengths.
    Love your wedding photos, by the way! 😉

    • Susan July 8, 2014 at 7:46 pm Reply

      Yes, that’s why we need partners who complement rather than being the exact replica of us 🙂 We suffered lots of mosquitoes taking that photo.

  4. Mumscalling July 9, 2014 at 7:24 am Reply

    I’m rather stubborn at times too. You’re right about the dance, not following the lead will get our toes all stepped on. Not a feel we would like.

    • Susan July 13, 2014 at 10:29 pm Reply

      Not to forget tripping over too. So remember to go with the flow at time 🙂

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