In another 2 weeks time, Sophie will be turning three.
I thought I would have bid goodbye to the terrible twos. But instead, I seem to be greeted by the tantrum-throwing threes. I know people say that we shouldn’t give such labels to our kids if we don’t want them to act out such negative affiliations. And trust me, I’m one of them who don’t do that … at least not in front of Sophie.
I needed help in dealing with those tantrums of hers which can quickly escalate into full blown melt downs if I don’t give what she wants or accede to her demands. It also didn’t help that I’ve become very impatient with her of late to the point that I even shouted in her face once when she simple refused to go to bed at 11pm!
Needless to say, she burst into tears and even wanted to smack me for scaring her with my sudden outburst. That night, we both cried to bed. Her, for being scared out of her wits by her manic mummy and me for losing my cool and turning into such a monster.
I know needed help.
To learn how to handle Sophie’s difficult behaviors, I have been reading this parenting book from Michele Borba titled, No more misbehavin’.
You would have thought that the book would dive into addressing all 38 difficult behaviors as it states on the cover. But instead the first chapter starts by getting you to take a good hard look at yourself as we are our kids biggest influence.
But the part that really made be think long and hard was the question, “how do you react when your child misbehaves and what message does it send to your child?” I knew then that if I wanted to correct her behaviors, I first had to deal with mine.
That screaming episode was 2 weeks ago. At my hubby’s advice, I have sleeping earlier so that I don’t get over tired and snappy easily. These days, I’ve been watching my temper and telling myself that I have to set an example for Sophie to follow if I want her to emulate the right behavior. It’s not easy all the time, especially when she threatens to go into her whining mode which gets under my skin.
Just last weekend, she got punished when she misbehaved so I refused to buy her dessert after dinner. She was so upset that she even went up to the cashier and told her, “I want my yogurt.” After standing in front of the counter and demanding her yogurt for 5 minutes, the crew came round with a small cup of yogurt for her.
A very ecstatic Sophie who got away with mummy’s punishment when the crew from Coffee Bean treated her to yogurt
She was really over the moon with her little treat.
I sure hope that that will be my first and last time losing my cool in front of her. I know that I’m far from being the perfect mum and neither am I expecting her to be a perfect kid. I am simply doing my best to bring her up to the best of my ability and to parent her with love. I know that I can never do it in my own strength, but only with strength and wisdom from God.
I hope that you’ll cheer me along as I endeavor to be a better mum. That’s the motivation I need for today’s Motivational Monday.
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” – Philippians 4:13
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