Last week, I heard the findings of a study that made me raise an eyebrow and go, “What?!” The study that I’m talking about? – “Couples who share housework more likely to divorce: Study“.
Of course, the first thing that I shot back at was that this researcher must be a guy and a MCP pig at that. Seriously, what times are we living in for him to make such a conclusion? Or perhaps it was all a conspiracy theory for the men in the house to be let off the hook from their share of the housework. Nice try.
Granted that they have acknowledged that this trend is most common among middle class professionals where divorce rates are already high and couples are so hung up on being organised with their schedules that perhaps dates even have to be penned down. So I guessing that for these couple, sharing the housework is all about keeping scores.
As a working mom, I have to admit that I struggle with the housework. I’m no domestic goddess and on bad days, I can have a week’s laundry not washed, maybe 3 weeks of unironed clothes, unkempt rooms which explains why my allergy acts up on weekends.
We did consider getting part-time help, but we can never get pass the idea of staying home a few hours on a weekend just for a spic and span home. So what has worked for us over the years is to divide and conquer the housework together as a team. Oh and yes, managing our expectations of what is a clean house.
Our arrangement has been working out so far, except that our weekends are way more tiring than weekdays because of the endless chores, which really is a chore! Between the cleaning, we have our share of bickering. But what we try never to do is to keep scores. That just hurts the relationship as it means that what we’re doing is not prompted by love, a sacrificial love I might add. How else would you call it when you have to drop what you want to do, like sleeping in, just so that the family can have a healthy environment to live in?
We have so many stress factors everyday to deal with. Don’t let the chores be another one on the list. By all means, get help if you need. In fact, we’re planning to get our moms to come round on the weekdays to supervise the part-time helper so that we can have a cleaner home and enjoy the weekends. I’ve been told it can help improve our marriage when we sweat less about the housework.
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